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GeroW4lll
26th July 2006, 09:56 AM
The first part of this post is in freeform verse - even thought it won't rhyme you will find it has a certain!
catchy rythem
and this is because i can't bring myself to really rhyme

so because it is rhyming day i suggest we list all the lymerics we can find our hand on to
give every one a good laugh

here goes:
concerning lymerics

Lymerics are verses canonical
and the subject is often anatomical
it remains to be seen
that the good one's aren't clean
and the clean one's are seldomly comical

theory of relativity

there once was a fellow named white
who could travel much faster than light
he went out one day
in a relative way
and came back the previos night

famous afrikaans - translated for rainy

met lippe geplooi wag tant smit
haar man eet terwyl sy net sit
indien jy nie weet nie
waarom sy nie eet nie
sy wag vir die oom se gebit!

with wrinckled lips aunt smit is waiting
her husband is eating while she's just sitting
if you don't know
why she is not eating
she is awaiting her turn with the dentures!

there once was a man from benoni
who ate too much beloni
he made a fart
hehind the cart
and paralised the pony

Val Ford: It's extremely difficult to find a polite rhyme for Nantucket - but I think I have succeeded!
(http://www.bbc.co.uk/jersey/space/poetry/lymerics.shtml)
A charming young man from Nantucket
Collected old coins in a bucket
He carried them with him
Hoping someone would give him
A groat, or a very rare ducat.


most of the lymerics I could find are way to dirty to put here - plz refer to lymeric 1.:D

mary had a little lamb
who had a touch of collic
she gave it brandy twice a day,
now it's an alcoholic

OK technically not a lymeric but funny

There once was a girl named Madonna
who asked all the guys: "Do yo wanna?"
Warren Beatty said no,
and he called her a "HO"
Now she cries and she smokes marijuana

A pansy who lived in Khartoum
Took a lesbian girl up to his room,
Then they argued all night
Over who had the right
To do what, and with which, to whom

A mosquito was heard to complain,
'A chemist has poisoned my brain!'
The cause of his sorrow
was paradichloro-
triphenyldichloroethane

A macho young swimmer named Dwyer,
Who really liked playing with fire
One night in the dark
Went to swim with a shark,
And his voice is now two octaves higher

TG
26th July 2006, 12:03 PM
Has anyone else noted,
that W4ll is the only one to have posted?

:)

Megnut3025
26th July 2006, 12:11 PM
YES TG we did
we thought that this was his bid
that only he may here post
while we sit here and eat our toast!

GeroW4lll
26th July 2006, 12:56 PM
hmmmmmmm
maybe it's cause i missplelt the word limericks.

maybe none of you silly buggers know that a limerick is a funny rhyme
who knows?

Drusky
26th July 2006, 04:24 PM
sexatnoontaxes....

wait thats not a limerick

FeralBanana
26th July 2006, 10:08 PM
In order to get his postcount a bit higher,
The posted a rhyme about Dwyer.
Appalled, I look;
It's true! I shook.
His postcount got a +1! Liar!

None limericks do I know,
That I can to you show.
I can make one up
or pretend to be a mup(pet)
Yet that will not allow me to go...

Thus a limerick I must find,
regardless of kind
(unless it be naughty)
(or somehow gaudy)
(in which case to be good I must remind)
..
(myself)

:D