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View Full Version : Oh no. Did the sky fall on my head ?



Punky3025
31st January 2008, 10:48 AM
The pub in South Shore is probably one of the most dangerous in the game. This is not really due to the pest problems experience by the influx of vermin from Tauren Mill but really because of the company at the bar. As a matter of interest the horde infestation was treated with a dose of "Wargeekocide" not so long ago so numbers are down. However I digress. Let me return to the story of why it is so dangerous.

There is a rather infamous and somewhat smelly Dwarf that I tend to hang around with, and he hangs about at the pub in South Shore. He claims to be a skilled engineer and an intellectual, but I tend to find that he has a rather single track mind. I would not defile your ears by saying that this single mindedness has to do with the voluptuous breasts of a dwarfish maiden and the possible engineering feats that could be achieved with them, but rather that he would be killing horde than well.....you know... doing some "engineering".

After 6 or seven to many barrels of South Shores finest the said Dwarf convinced us that Kharazhan is a fantastic holiday destination. He even promised to the ever "AFK" Tenghi ( Who's wife is once again pregnant) that he might score a bit of "engineering" at said luxury destination. Less I digress again even further, on with the story.

After booking flights with Gryphon INC to Shattrath City. Myself and 3 other suitably intoxicated and therefore pliably minded Wargeeks headed for the dungeons to obtain one part of the key we require for Crosseye's holiday of a lifetime offer. The dungeon proved somewhat more "interesting" than explained by the Dwarf. I personally spent at least twenty minutes removing arrow shards from my precious tail because the ever loving Oakroot failed to hold aggro. This druid is a fantastic fellow particularly in bear form. He is however easily distracted by the tiniest things of nature and will stop to admire spiders in the middle of battle. I sometimes even think that he feels sorry for horde and will spare the occasional life if I am not watching.

After plenty of mace swinging, tail restoration and such things we arrived in the halls of the villainous key holder. At this point we had a visit from an old friend. He strolled into the halls in his roughish leather duds, not a single battle scratch on them I might add, and ninja looted his key part after a bit of sword swinging and strolled out again leaving the rest of us to deal with a now very grumpy boss(no names shall be mentioned) . Killing the Boss' key holding pet had done nothing to improve his mood.

It is round about this part of the story that you have to understand the art of death. This is something that we put a lot of work into perfecting, it would seem, whenever we get drunk enough to actually listen to Crosseye. I generally find, personally, that once I sober up after one of these events it becomes clear in my mind why there is goblin and gnomish engineering but no dwarfish intellectual property whatsoever.
This boss was a real challenge, the fights we had were long and hard. We had so many visits to the graveyard that I found Gundy flirting with the angel of death.
I have to say that we finally got him. (not Gundy... the Boss)

The funniest part of the whole tale, aside from the fact that we got mislead by a dwarf again, was the death of said boss. It was our final attempt. The battle was epic, Oak was tanking like a .....well tank. Tenghi left fondling his tail to do some serious healing. Gundy was doing what ever Warlocks do when they are not being seduced by batwoman. Crosseye was giggling and shooting, and Mediatrix was doing the dps. The order of who died first is not clear in my mind but all I remember is deploying my trusty earth elemental after oak went down. "The boss falls.....I have survived.....WOOOOT."

.......and then the sky fell on my head and I died. Confusion reigned more than usual in my mind......how had I died ? Once Oakroot recovered from his fits of laughter ( His love for nature, and its wellbeing, does not extend to me obviously) he explained that as our slain foe fell, the axe he wielded, slipped from his his dying hands and landed squarely upon my noggin. I failed to see the humour in the situation. This experience was made even worse by arriving in the graveyard to see a naked gnome bottom and the Angel of Death entangled with one another. I will never understand the fascination Gundy has with demonic and undead women !

So we have the first past of a key for Kara. I for one will be stepping way back the next time I slay a Goliath, lest some falling appendage dent my triumph and pride once again.

TG
31st January 2008, 11:00 AM
+Rep!

:rofl:

senorblinky
31st January 2008, 11:24 AM
That was pure literary genius. I cannot commend you enough for the absolute pleasure I had reading this, however, i will quote my best bits for posterity.

Top notch Punky, uit die boonste rakke my maat, jy is 'n bobaas storieverteller!



This druid is a fantastic fellow particularly in bear form. He is however easily distracted by the tiniest things of nature and will stop to admire spiders in the middle of battle. I sometimes even think that he feels sorry for horde and will spare the occasional life if I am not watching.




This is something that we put a lot of work into perfecting, it would seem, whenever we get drunk enough to actually listen to Crosseye




Tenghi left fondling his tail to do some serious healing.




This experience was made even worse by arriving in the graveyard to see a naked gnome bottom and the Angel of Death entangled with one another


Classic story my boy!

CarRi0n
31st January 2008, 11:37 AM
A very good read, well done punky.

Titan
31st January 2008, 12:58 PM
10/10 Punks, you should make a plan and write an "Epic WoW Adventure" of the WarGeeks, I think it would be awesome!!! :bow:

senorblinky
31st January 2008, 01:31 PM
10/10 Punks, you should make a plan and write an "Epic WoW Adventure" of the WarGeeks, I think it would be awesome!!! :bow:

Seconded.
I would love to contribute to that as well, and i think TG has some EPIC EPIC EPIC stories to gooi in there as well.

Punky3025
31st January 2008, 01:36 PM
@ SB. Using words like "gooi" will remove you from the "Epic Adventures of the WarGeeks" as far as the east is from the west !. Consider yourself served :D
*Punky rides off with blue lights flashing and sirens screeching*

senorblinky
31st January 2008, 02:08 PM
So sorry to hear that punks.
I'll ask my sister to register on the site and correct the errors I make, seeing as I'm too stupid to notice them myself...

Punky3025
31st January 2008, 02:33 PM
So sorry to hear that punks.
I'll ask my sister to register on the site and correct the errors I make, seeing as I'm too stupid to notice them myself...

You are obviously not sorry. If you were you would stop hiding behind your sister and take your leg pulling like a man. Don't gooi the baby out with the bath water. Please don't use the excuse of stupidity when you don't qualify.

senorblinky
31st January 2008, 02:38 PM
?!
Did you forget how this works?!

You insult me
I insult you
You insult me
I insult you
[copy and paste here]

not like this
You insult me
I insult you
You tune me i'm getting to serious and you're only poking fun and blah blah blah, forcing me to say that i was being sarcastic since YOUR brother edited your post and...
no man punks, kom in die game, jy weet hoe dit werk.

The day i take you seriously is the day that Darnit phones me and says, "look, you better take him seriously!"

CarRi0n
31st January 2008, 02:40 PM
Gladiators get ready ----- FIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!

Darnit696
31st January 2008, 03:01 PM
Sheesh I cant get through... that damn number is always busy!!!

stoke
31st January 2008, 03:01 PM
Shuddap CaRi0n, you posts have too many minuses in them!

Darnit696
31st January 2008, 03:07 PM
wahrraa wahrra wharra... Please don't use the excuse of stupidity when you don't qualify.

THIS is a compliment :shock: its well hidden... very well hidden BUT its actually a compliment. :D

senorblinky
31st January 2008, 03:24 PM
I KNOW it's a compliment, i can see that, it's a very nice one, and i know how difficult it must've been. But that's just not the way the game is played! :p
Ag, i love you two Bornmen the most! (wonda and Dru are really, really cool, but you two qualify for a bit of man-love! And no, that's not prison lingo :valkoog: )

:rofl:

Thumponius
31st January 2008, 03:56 PM
As someone who lurks on TS, due to my main/only being too wimpy to join in just yet, I can attest that all of the above is true and that I have lost count of the number of times I've died because I couldn't see the beasties through the tears of mirth and laughter.

It was truly educational to listen in last night and I have given up fish for Lent.

Lynus
31st January 2008, 07:01 PM
I dont get it!

TG
31st January 2008, 09:24 PM
"don't"

You have been served!

http://www.wargeeks.org/images/gp.jpg

senorblinky
31st January 2008, 10:21 PM
"don't"

You have been served!

http://www.wargeeks.org/images/gp.jpg

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
OMW you're going to get miles out of that!

WondaWoman
3rd February 2008, 02:55 PM
Punky you are most awesome !